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Movie Quotes for America’s Sweethearts
"
Kiki! Kiki! I don’t know where that girl is."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Everyone hates me, everyone wants a piece of me. My therapist is out of the country, I wasn’t nominated for a Golden Globe this year! Leave me alone!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
I will kick your ass! Okay? Understand that!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Hank Azaria
Character:
Hector
"
I bet you’ve never read a book in your life."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
He wants to go second."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
I’ll kill him! That sick son-of-a-bitch bastard! Put him on the speaker!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Kingman
"
Hi, can I get Holly Golightly’s room please?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
You know what? For that matter, I’m an idiot, too! In that respect, we’re actually quite perfect for each other."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
And you, you moron! The only reason she’s here, besides trying to salvage her precious career, is to serve you with divorce papers. There, I’ve said it. I’ve done all I can do here, I’m going for a walk because that’s, you know…leaving is just something that I’ve really perfected. And so, once more, with feeling."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Who am I? I am de ass kicker of you!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Hank Azaria
Character:
Hector
"
I blew it. I lost her."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
He can go second. No, wait a minute. He should go first. I don’t want to look like his opening act. I want to go second."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
He tried to kill me, Lee. Am I the only person who remembers that? Attempted murder doesn’t get people’s attention anymore?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Hi, Hal! How are you, darling? You’re in my thoughts. I want to send you a basket."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Kingman
"
No! No, she is lying!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Hank Azaria
Character:
Hector
"
Yes, I do! I’m going first!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
You slept with her?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
I don’t know what it means, it’s very old."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Alan Arkin
Character:
Wellness Guide
"
Okay, Siegfried and Roy just left the building. They’re heading for the pool deck."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
You really need to go to this junket."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
What? I’m not invited to the hunket?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Hank Azaria
Character:
Hector
"
Because you’re an idiot!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I’m just trying to facilitate the…"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Well, I have one theory…"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Good morning. How do you feel?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Ooh! This is good! Hit him! Hit him!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Dave
"
Gwen, um…hi. I used to be a big fan, but…I’m sorry, I just can’t get over what happened between you and Eddie. I’m so sick over it. I can’t sleep at night. How can you?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julie Wagner
Character:
Caller #1
"
Love is a bridge built between two people. We want what exists between them to be real. My name is Hal Weidmann. The film you are about to see is Time Over Time, or is it? The details are unimportant. Simply put, the script was shit. I tossed it. I instead decided to let the camera capture real life. I filmed my actors without their knowledge. I let the camera run after takes. I placed hidden cameras around the set. The end result is a story far more involving than anything manufactured by actors and writers. This is real life. The juice. The stink. The glory."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Christopher Walken
Character:
Hal Weidmann
"
No! There’s only been one genius in this business, and that was Seor Wences! A little lipstick, some hair, and his hand, and the guy had a career for eighty-five years! S’aright!."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Kingman
"
Lee, you know, I love you. You know, I’d do anything for you. You’re just asking an awful lot…Well, a press junket with Eddie isn’t high on Gwen’s list of priorities…Oh, no lillies. Take them out…Yes. I understand…Yes, excuse me, hold on…"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
It’s just not fair. There’s all this pressure on me, and none whatsoever on Eddie, is there? He’s probably all Summer having the time of his life."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Is this a scene from their new movie, Time Over Time? No. That’s Gwen Harrison and Eddie Thomas dancing in the moonlight for real. Hard to believe that America’s Sweethearts are like we never thought we’d see them again…"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Charley Steiner
Character:
Nevada Anchorman
"
What the hell is going on?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Hank Azaria
Character:
Hector
"
Oh, yeah. I mean, it won’t help the initial release, but it’ll rent like crazy when it goes to video. We can do a box like a coffin, maybe wrap it in a little black ribbon."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
This is a very complicated situation…"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
I know."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Guy goes to his rabbi. He says, I think my wife’s trying to poison me. Rabbi says Let me talk to her. Comes back a little later and says Listen I spoke to your wife for three hours. Take the poison. You get it? You and Gwen are over."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Does this have something to do with Gwen?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Come on! It’s not always about love. Sometimes you just need to get laid."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Can I explain why I didn’t call?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Shit, he’s gonna jump!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
I don’t care about Gwen! I’m talking about Kiki."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
My quote in the yearbook was, Hey we have to talk. I was despised."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I can’t do this Lee."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Ladies and gentlemen, here they are…Eddie and Gwen, together again! America’s Sweethearts."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Remember the crazy guy in the woods?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Dave
"
Read from the top line Sasha."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
No, you cannot. Who’s her father?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Oh, my God! He’s gonna jump!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Hi, Larry. Gwen, I saw your latest movie."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Leilani Muenter
Character:
Caller #2
"
Oh, and Hector is very well-endowed."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Can I defend my father’s work?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Keri Lynn Pratt
Character:
Leaf Weidmann
"
Just…I want to talk!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Oh Kiki my butter has touched another food. I need new butter. Anything you want honey. That’s the way it goes Lee. Right? You’re a publicist you know. Anything they want right? She’s got a green dress. Looks like crap on her. Brings out the circles under her eyes she knows it I know it. She gave it to me. It actually looks pretty nice on me. Then she said well maybe she wanted it back you know? She doesn’t want it she just doesn’t want me to have it. That’s the truth."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I don’t care! I don’t care! Why is this an issue?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Let me think about how I answer that? Um, not…you know…"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
You know what? I need an assistant, because if I had an assistant, she would be outside right now MILKING A COW and I would never, EVER, run out of butter!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
What are you…? What is that?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Maybe I can get him to commit suicide. Would you like that?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Don’t worry. I know somebody."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Here are your eggs, my darling sister! I hope that’s runny enough for you."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I am grateful for you. In all the world, thing I am most grateful for is you."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Are you seeing anybody?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Siegfried and Roy are here?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Seth Green
Character:
Danny
"
Yeah, the Unabomber. Okay? Remember how he lived in that little cabin?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Dave
"
Who, the guy at Fox?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Dave
"
It’s him. On the phone."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
We have a saying, Edward: Meck-a-leck-a-hala-vabeem-sala-beem."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Alan Arkin
Character:
Wellness Guide
"
How will you get Eddy and Gwen there?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Seth Green
Character:
Danny
"
She lost sixty pounds."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Will you please go talk to your sister? You’re the only one she’ll pretend to listen to."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Ha! I read all four of the Harry Potter books!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Okay. We’ll try the letter some other time."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Alan Arkin
Character:
Wellness Guide
"
She gave it to me."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Well…maybe like this."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Well, you do sleep next to a very handsome young Spanish gentleman, do you not?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Larry King
Character:
Larry King
"
Did you cut this yourself?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Actually, it’s a gun."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Yeah, but you got twenty or thirty pounds of food to break your fall. What the hell happened?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Ooh, yeah. No, that’s good. No, no, wait…imagine if he killed himself at the premiere."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Dave
"
Do me a favor. Don’t tell anyone you’re in the movie business."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Seth Green
Character:
Danny
"
No, that one’s mine."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
I smell smoke. Is somebody smoking?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Life is a cookie."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Alan Arkin
Character:
Wellness Guide
"
Yes, I do. I do love you. I love that beautiful, bright, sexy woman up on the screen…"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
You know what this is? This is high school all over again. Nothing has changed. You wanted to break up with one of your boyfriends, did you do it? No! You made me do it."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I said I was going to give him the divorce papers."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Gwen, your dog just swallowed your window washer."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
He said not technically."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
And I gave it to her."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
So, do you want to arrive first or second?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
You’re going second. Eddie? You’re going second."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Yeah, I feel something along those lines. Good, weird. Weird, good."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Is that Pussy Boy?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Hank Azaria
Character:
Hector
"
I don’t care! Can we just get to the hotel?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Don’t let me interrupt."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
If only. The dog."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I know everyone does it! That’s not the point!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Rule number two: Don’t take credit until someone actually says they like what you did. It’s not bad."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
She doesn’t! She lives with someone else!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Look at you. What did you do? Is it your hair? What is it?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Eddie Thomas and Gwen Harrison: America’s Sweethearts."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Character:
Narrator
"
Hey! Come on, these are new pants. Good dog. Hey, get the paper? Come on. Come on. Please. Come on."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Is that your foot?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Your pillow’s better than mine."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
America first fell in love with Eddie Thomas and Gwen Harrison in the box office smash Autumn With Greg And Peg. They had the most celebrated marriage in Hollywood. Who could forget how they hit one out of the park in Requiem for an Outfielder?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Character:
Narrator
"
Fine, let her come second. I don’t care. Let her come behind me. That way she’ll be able to see the knife she stuck in my back."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Survival rule number three, kid: You’re not here to love anyone. You’re here to promote a movie. That’s it. Period. Say you’re here and you get word that your mother died. You know, like, hit by a bus or something. You go downstairs, you shed a tear, and you say, It’s a shame. She would have loved this movie."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
See? He loves me."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
It’s a movie, a great movie. Hepburn."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
You know the expression, falling off the wagon Lee? This is what it looks like."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I was thinking about eating that breadstick."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
It’s my hair, and, err…I had a little sun."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
If you would have asked me a couple of hours ago, I would have said no. But something happened tonight that was really incredible. I was out walking by the cottages, and it was like Gwen was drawing me to her. And I just look over this wall, and there she was. She was standing by the pool, all dressed in white, like an angel in the desert. I thought to myself: That’s why you’re here. You’re supposed to win her back. No way she’s gonna stay with Hector. I mean there’s no way. That’s the woman I’m supposed to spend the rest of my life with."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
What are they, out of butter? How can you run out of butter."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I don’t want to talk to you!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
He’s a dead man. No, I’m serious. I know a guy, I’ll make a call, and…he’s dead."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Dave
"
Me too. What were you thinking about?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Puppy? It’s a raptor."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
I’m thorry, it wath the thudio’th dethithion."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
I hate Larry King! Why did I do his stupid show?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
I spent eighty-six million dollars of the studio’s money on twenty seconds of titles. That’s all he sent me, the TITLES! And a note: Dave we could also do these in blue. We HAD to make a Hal Weidmann picture!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Kingman
"
Let’s go to our next call. Rock Island, Illinois, hello."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Larry King
Character:
Larry King
"
I see that. Yeah. You look terrific."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Eddie, Eddie, are you okay?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
So, what you’re really worried about is you."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
This is Kishtonga Root!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
I slept with him."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Gwen, everybody does it."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
What does that mean?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
You’re going second."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Second? We’re all set."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
I tried to walk away, but the guy just kept pushing. So I hit him in the tray with my face."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Well, at least let me defend Hector. I only slept with him once, but I know his penis is bigger than a roll of quarters."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Keri Lynn Pratt
Character:
Leaf Weidmann
"
I don’t care! I don’t care! I don’t care! I don’t care!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Bad morning. Preceded by thirty three bad years."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I’m always thinking about other people."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Okay, yes, I did it on my Mac."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Seth Green
Character:
Danny
"
What the hell is wrong with you, Kiki?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Let go of me!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I know."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I know you are."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
And…And…And I lost a little weight."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
What is that? Bean salad?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Eddie is not demented. It was a one-time incident. This is a forgive-and-forget kind of thing."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Yeah, the girl I used to make movies with. But that’s not the real you. That’s you pretending to be real, which you’re really good at. So when I’m with you in real life, I think I’m going to be with the real you, but I’m not. I’m with the real you that’s with me right now, not the real you from the movies, and I don’t want to be with…you."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Are you okay now?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Well, Lee, I have to say, you have completely outdone yourself. In twenty-four hours, you’ve given us a walk in the woods, a romantic dinner, and a fist fight. I can’t wait to see what happens next!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Dave
"
Oh, you are funny! How do you live with him, Gwen?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Wendy Schenker
Character:
Maura Klein
"
If that’s a line from one of your movies…"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
She gets a cottage and I get the shitty little suite?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Oh yes, they do. I was in a store the other day, you know that great store on Melrose? And there was a baby in a stroller and he was looking up at me and he was judging me. The whole world is judging me for what I did to Eddie."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
I’m with Gwen now. We’re a couple. So we’re gonna go to the hhhunket together."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Hank Azaria
Character:
Hector
"
She has an entourage."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
They liked the movie. The press actually liked this crazy movie. They’re calling it the Blair Bitch Project."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Just smile and shut up."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
That woman that you saw by the pool the other night…"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Let him go second."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
It’s Gwen’s code name. It’s from Breakfast at Tiffany’s."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Are you comfortable speaking about Gwen?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Alan Arkin
Character:
Wellness Guide
"
It’s probably Larry. How many heart attacks has he had?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
It’s awful when you’re the only person who cares about other people’s feelings. If they see Eddie and he’s down and depressed, they’re going to pity him and blame me."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Hector? Are you in love with him?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I just couldn’t sit through it. I can’t watch you without Eddie. It’s just not the same."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Leilani Muenter
Character:
Caller #2
"
That’s not true. The lighting was great. Everyone said you looked great."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
No, that woman that you just have to spend the rest of your life with…"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
And if you’re in love, you should just go for it…The way you went for this breakfast."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
It’s not really mine."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Come on, you’ve gotta confront her. Get it over with. She fell in love with another guy, alright? It happens."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Let’s go. Please. Please, make my day."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Hank Azaria
Character:
Hector
"
As if she really knows."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
People have no idea what it’s like being me. Did we brush my teeth?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
I don’t want to breathe! Your last two movies crashed and burned…I wanted to choke him to death with those stupid suspenders. Everyone hates me."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
This letter, Edward, is a very important part of the healing process. By writing to your mother, you afford yourself the opportunity to thank her, or forgive her, or to ask her why she did the things she did. Now we don’t mail the letter, but the simple act of putting it on paper frees you, allows you to let go. Now…what did you say to your mother?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Alan Arkin
Character:
Wellness Guide
"
Thank you."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
What are you thinking right now?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Could you please put that out? Please, please, please. Could you please put that out. Please, please."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
That’s a nice necklace."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
Here are your eggs, there you go!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Well, let me uncomplicate it for you, huh? Forget about what happened between us, Eddie. It’s not going to work, all right? I mean, last night…last night was great. But then she calls you this morning and you just cannot wait to get out the door to get to her! What is that? It’s just not going to work, ’cause you will probably always be thinking about her, and I will probably always be wondering if you were thinking about her. I just…I just need you to know one thing."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
He was outside my cottage doing something…not good!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
A lot, actually, and you know, I cannot believe that it’s taken me this long to figure it out. And…and…and I’m going to go for a long walk now just to simmer down. But before I do, I would just like to cut through the bullshit. You see, sister, the reason why he’s not technically seeing anyone is because he’s still technically hung up on you."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Well, that’s fascinating. Not technically…hmm…That’s…uh…that’s sad really. That’s…uh…that’s a shame."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Really? The…The…The woman by the pool?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
You have an entourage?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Time for Prozac. Excuse me."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Oh, please! Let’s just refresh your memory. Robert Mancuta? Kyle Hassler? Toby Franks? Half the lacrosse team? Ring any bells? Huh? By the end of the year, I was the most hated girl in school."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
I don’t give a shit!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Eddie, the next time you try to kill yourself, just take a hairdryer into the bathtub."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
I’m on pain medication that makes me say things I’d never say otherwise. To set the record perfectly straight, Eddie and I never had any plans to reconcile."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Eddie’s really good…and he’s my pillar of strength, you know. It’s like Sodom and Gomorrah"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
I feel good. I mean…I feel weird, but I feel good. You?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
John Cusack
Character:
Eddie
"
I’m joking…I mean, I’m…thinking out loud, or whatever you call it."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Dave
"
And those glasses. Who wears frames that big anymore. He looks like a bug!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
Kiki? What was that movie called?"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Character:
Gwen
"
I need Eddy and Gwen back together again, smiling and happy!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Dave
"
He’s not gonna jump."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Billy Crystal
Character:
Lee
"
Hal Weidmann bought that cabin from the government and had it moved onto his property. That is where he edits his movies. That is his little, twisted, sicko office."
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Stanley Tucci
Character:
Dave
"
Kiki? Kiki-kins? Who’s smoking? I smell smoke. Is someone smoking within a six mile radius of where I’m standing! Stop them Kiki, stop them!"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Julia Roberts
Character:
Kiki
"
Well, no, Chad in Marketing…"
Movie:
America's Sweethearts
Actor:
Seth Green
Character:
Danny
keep looking »
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