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Movie Quotes for About Schmidt
Let’s not talk about that now.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Howard Hesseman
Character:
Larry Hertzel
The other night I had a dream and it was very real. Your mother was there and you were there and your aunt Estelle. And there was a…well, it wasn’t really a spaceship, it was more like a blimp or an orb of some kind. And then a bunch of weird creatures came out and started trying to take you away, and you wanna know what? They all looked like Randall. Do you understand? And I was jumping up and down to save you.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
Well Ndugu, I’ll close now. You probably can’t wait to run and cash this check and get yourself something to eat.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
Ok. What would you like on it?
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Melissa Hanna
Character:
Dairy Queen Employee
You’re not gonna believe this. We had a tire swing over there.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
Uhh…I’ll have the Reese’s Pieces…and some cookie dough.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
All I know is I lost $800.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Mark Venhuizen
Character:
Duncan Hertzel
Eh…no, I think I’m fine now.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
All of a sudden you’re taking an interest in what I do? You have an opinion about my life now? Okay, you listen to me. I am getting married the day after tomorrow and you are going to come to my wedding and you are going to sit there and enjoy it and support me or else you can just turn right around right now and go back to Omaha.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Hope Davis
Character:
Jeannie Schmidt
You mean that pyramid scheme?
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Mark Venhuizen
Character:
Duncan Hertzel
You already know how famously they get along as friends, but did you know that their sex life is positively white hot? The main reason both of my marriages failed was sexual. I’m an extremely sexual person, I can’t help it, it just how I’m wired, you know, even when I was a little girl. I had my first orgasm when I was 6 in ballet class. Anyway, the point is that I have been always very easily aroused and very orgasmic, Jeannie and I have a lot in common that way. Clifford and Larry, they were nice guys, but they just could not keep up with me. Anyway, I don’t want to betray Jeannie’s confidence, but let me just assure you that whatever problems those two kids may run into along the way, they will always be able to count on what happens between the sheets to keep them together. More soup?
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Kathy Bates
Character:
Roberta Hertzel
I’d like a blizzard with vanilla ice cream.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
What are you talking about?
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Hope Davis
Character:
Jeannie Schmidt
You’re making a big mistake, don’t marry this guy, don’t do it.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
I know we’re all pretty small in the big scheme of things, and I suppose the most you can hope for is to make some kind of difference, but what kind of difference have I made? What in the world is better because of me?
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
Larry, we’ve been welcomed by you, thank you so much, now would you please just drink your fucking milk and shut the fuck up.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Kathy Bates
Character:
Roberta Hertzel
Helen, what did you really think of me, deep in your heart? Was I really the man you wanted to be with? Was I? Or were you disappointed and too nice to show it? I forgive you for Ray. I forgive you. That was a long time ago, and I know I wasn’t always the king of kings. I let you down. I’m sorry, Helen. Can you forgive me? Can you forgive me?
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
Randall, what happened about that investment opportunity? You never called me back.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
Don’t dilly-dally.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
June Squibb
Character:
Helen Schmidt
People used to think it was strange ’cause I breast-fed him ’til he was almost five, but I say – hunh, just look at the results!
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Kathy Bates
Character:
Roberta Hertzel
Relatively soon, I will die. Maybe in 20 years, maybe tomorrow, it doesn’t matter. Once I am dead and everyone who knew me dies too, it will be as though I never existed. What difference has my life made to anyone. None that I can think of. None at all.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
All I was doing was welcoming somebody into the family.
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Howard Hesseman
Character:
Larry Hertzel
You can’t marry him. I mean…Look at these people!
Movie:
About Schmidt
Actor:
Jack Nicholson
Character:
Warren Schmidt
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