Loading
Browse quotes by:
Actor
Character
Movie
Year
Shop
Blog
Memes
Apps
Movie Quotes for A Fish Called Wanda
Get me my drink.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
I used to kill for the CIA.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Winners, like North Vietnam?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
No I have to finish my hair!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Fuck off, pigs.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
Relax. I heard moaning; I was worried.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Well, if you absolutely insist…
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
And he’s going to be very pleased with me to find you here, all tied up and ready for the police!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
He just happens to be a very good friend of mine!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
You must be j-j-j…
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Michael Palin
Character:
Ken
The central message of Buddhism is not every man for himself.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
What are you doing?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
I’m here because I’m bored. Bored hanging around this God-awful city. Shoving George’s ugly pic…Talking to a lot of snotty, stuck up, intellectual British faggots. Jesus they’re uptight they get rigor mortis in the prime of life in this country, standing there with their hair clenched.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Well, you can t-t-trust them and they don’t sh-sh-sh-sh
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Michael Palin
Character:
Ken
I don’t know. Let’s just see what happens.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
I’m sorry! I’m sorry. Uh…uh…yeah.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
What have you found out?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Aristotle was not Belgian, the principle of Buddhism is not every man for himself and the London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes Otto. I looked them up.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Did you hear what I said? Fuck off!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
I’m tellin’ ya baby, they kicked your little ass there. Boy, they whooped yer hide REAL GOOD.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
Ok well I’m outta here!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I’m just trying to think of one good reason why I should take you to South America with me.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
Say something in Russian.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
What about my tits?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Jesus, I said I’m sorry! What the fu-?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
You’re really sorry.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Have you heard from him?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
You are the vulgarian, you fuck.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Otto! You owe me a pou-p-pou…
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Michael Palin
Character:
Ken
Please, I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I didn’t know it was you. How could I know it was you? I mean, how could you expect me to guess? Stupid jerk! I mean, what the fuck were you doing robbing your own house?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
My father was in the Secret Service, Mr. Manfredjinsinjin, and I know perfectly well that you don’t keep the general public informed when you are debriefing KGB defectors in a safe house.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Maria Aitken
Character:
Wendy
Son of a bitch!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Aisle or window, smoking or non?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Clare McIntyre
Character:
Airline Employee
Shit! Fucking Limey cement.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Pork away pal. Fuck her blue.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
So…how are you going to get friendly with this lawyer?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Otto t-t-tried to k-k-kiss me.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Michael Palin
Character:
Ken
When you say friendly what are we talking about here? Cordial? Courteous? Supportive? What?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
It’s K-K-K-Ken! C-c-c-coming to k-k-k-kill me! How you gonna c-c-c-catch me, K-K-K-Ken?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
And don’t call me Otto. To you I am Mr…
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I’m really really sorry, I apologise unreservedly.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
I used to box for Oxford.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
Look, you obviously don’t know anything about intelligence work, lady. It’s an X-K-Red-27 technique.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto West
You tell those pigs to fuck off.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Tom Georgeson
Character:
George
Wake up Limey fish!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
You just wanted to get me into bed.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
What are you thinking, Archie?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
I am Italian! Sono italiano in spirito. Ma ho sposato una donna che preferisce lavorare in giardino a fare l’amore appassionato. Uno sbaglio grande! But it’s such an ugly language. How about…Russian?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
So, friendly might include actual…what penetration?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I looked at the clock…because I was saying to myself…It’s five to seven, where could he be going with that sawed off shotgun?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Okay, fine, Ken! Come at me, give me your best shot! Go on, Ken! You don’t have the guts, admit it!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
People are always taking advantage of me.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Wanda, do you have any idea what it’s like being English? Being so correct all the time, being so stifled by this dread of, of doing the wrong thing, of saying to someone Are you married? and hearing My wife left me this morning or saying, uh, Do you have children? and being told they all burned to death on Wednesday. You see Wanda we’ll all terrified of embarrassment. That’s why we’re so…dead. Most of my friends are dead you know we have these piles of corpses to dinner. But you’re alive God bless you and I want to be I’m so fed up with all this. I want to make love with you Wanda. I’m a good lover – at least used to be back in the early 14th century. Can we go to bed?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
Hello, Mr. Burglar! Going somewhere? Thought you could rob Mr. Leach, eh? Well, I’m going to teach you a lesson!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Bye Wanda!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
You’re going to shoot me?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
Yes they do, Otto. They just don’t understand it. Now let me correct you on a couple of things, OK? Aristotle was not Belgian. The central message of Buddhism is not Every man for himself. And the London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes Otto. I looked them up.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
How come you dumped me then.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Otto! Otto! Otto!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
All right, all right, I apologise.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
Okay, you have the guts, good…wait!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
What is this? Hump a Limey week?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
We could have a lot of fun together, you and I. And I think we’d be really good for each other. What do you say?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Nix! Zip! Diddly! Bupkis!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I’m, uh, Harvey. Manfred…jen…sen…den.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
You take it back.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I got the deal of a lifetime! Fifty-fifty, you and me, what do you say! Okay, okay, okay, sixty-forty! That’s my final offer!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
…he thought that the Gettysburg Address was where Lincoln lived.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
I was dealing with something delicate, Otto. I’m setting up a guy who’s incredibly important to us, who’s going to tell me where the loot is and if they’re going to come and arrest you. And you come loping in like Rambo without a jockstrap and you dangle him out a fifth-floor window. Now, was that smart? Was it shrewd? Was it good tactics? Or was it stupid?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
How could a bright and smart girl like you have a brother who is so…
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
How about…because I have the key to the safety deposit box?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Archie? Do you speak Italian?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
You know your problem? You don’t like winners.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Just, counting the seconds to the weekends so they can all dress up like ballerinas and whip themselves into a frenzy at the flat at 4. 2B St.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Does he get to handle them?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Ken! Ken! Wait, wait, Ken! Kenny! I…may I call you Kenny?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Apes don’t read philosophy.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto West
You asshole! You stupid, stiff, pompous, English…!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
You’re a very attractive man, Ken. You’re…smart, you’ve got wonderful bones, great eyes, and you dress really interestingly.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I Wendy- I Wanda- I wonder…
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
Ok…Ok…DISAPPOINTED. Son of a bitch. What do you have to do in this world to make people trust you?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Death!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Michael Palin
Character:
Ken
So the old lady’s gonna m-m-m-meet with an accident eh K-K-K-K-Ken?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
You realise he’s in court tomorrow?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Oh, my God…Oh…Oh my God. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I know. I know that!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Even if you were my brother I’d still want to fuck you.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
We need to talk.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
superior, so fucking superior with those phony accents.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
May I kiss you, Ken?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
He doesn’t have a clue.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Why on earth not?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Maria Aitken
Character:
Wendy
I love watching your ass when you walk. Is that beautiful or what? Don’t go near him, he’s mine.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Unbe-fuck-alievable!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Tom Georgeson
Character:
George
I want you to know something Otto.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Let’s make love.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
You spineless bimbo.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I don’t know – I’ll improvise.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
So, wanna have some lunch?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Touch his dick, and he’s dead!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
You really like animals don’t you, Ken? What’s the attraction.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Your father has finally gone completely mental!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Maria Aitken
Character:
Wendy
Avoid the green ones. They’re not ripe yet.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Oh, I’m so very, very, very ssssssssssss…FUCK YOU!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
No, you fucking can’t!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Michael Palin
Character:
Ken
To be honest I hate them. I mean pretending they’re so fucking lawyer.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I’m sorry about my brother, Ken. I know he’s insensitive. He’s had a hard life. Dad used to beat him up.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
No plans to see him?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
You can stick this marriage right in your bottom.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Maria Aitken
Character:
Wendy
Shut up and think.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Not you Ken, you have a beautiful speaking voice…when it works.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
What was the part in the middle?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Wait, I got an idea! You take it all! Yeah, here’s my boarding pass, Ken!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I thought he might.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
Show off all the t-time.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Michael Palin
Character:
Ken
Your brother didn’t bring you here this time, did he?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
How very interesting. You’re a true vulgarian, aren’t you?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
Yes. That’s my forecast. I’ll stand by that.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
K-k-k-k-Ken. You bastard. Hey I’ve lost my stutter. It’s gone. I can speak. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Michael Palin
Character:
Ken
I wasn’t rich enough, remember.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
Get the fuck out of here, Otto.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
I fell in love with you.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
REVENGE!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Michael Palin
Character:
Ken
I’m gonna, I’m gonna k-ka, kill you!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Michael Palin
Character:
Ken
Okay, I’m-sorry-I-ate-your-fish, okay? I’m-sorry!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
You are the sexiest, most beautiful girl I have ever seen…in my entire life.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
Oh, right! To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people! I’ve known sheep that could outwit you. I’ve worn dresses with higher IQs. But you think you’re an intellectual, don’t you, ape?
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
I love robbing the English, they’re so polite.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Don’t call me stupid.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Nice fish, Ken. You know what Nietzsche said about animals? They were God’s second blunder.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Oh, you English are so superior, aren’t you? Well, would you like to know what you’d be without us, the good ol’ U.S. of A. to protect you? I’ll tell you. The smallest fucking province in the Russian Empire, that’s what! So don’t call me stupid, lady. Just thank me.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Well, you t-t-t-tell him from me that I kuh-kuh, I kuh-kuh…
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Michael Palin
Character:
Ken
Well, thank you for popping in and protecting us.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Maria Aitken
Character:
Wendy
Hello, K-K-K-Ken’s p-p-pets!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
If it wasn’t for us, you’d all be speaking German! Singing Deutschland Deutschland
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Yep, ‘fraid so, ol’ chap! Sorry!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
Shut up. We didn’t lose Vietnam. It was a tie!
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I’ll be right back, take your clothes off.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Jamie Lee Curtis
Character:
Wanda
You pompous, stuck-up, snot-nosed, English, giant, twerp, scumbag, fuck-face, dickhead, asshole.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
Kevin Kline
Character:
Otto
I do, I offer a complete and utter retraction. The imputation was totally without basis in fact, and was in no way fair comment, and was motivated purely by malice, and I deeply regret any distress that my comments may have caused you, or your family, and I hereby undertake not to repeat any such slander at any time in the future.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie
You make me feel free.
Movie:
A Fish Called Wanda
Actor:
John Cleese
Character:
Archie