Movie Quotes for Movie Quotes Said By Ace Ventura - MovieQuoter

Excuse me, gentleman. Pet Detective. Come on, what’s the matter with you? Can’t you hit me?

Good night, everybody. You’ve been a wonderful audience, I’ll be here all week. Be sure to tip your waitress.

Excuse me sir, but do you have a mint? Perhaps some Binaca?

Yes, yes, oh yes! Can you feel that buddy? I have exorcised the demons. This house is clean.

Captain’s Log, stardate 23.9, rounded off to the…nearest decimal point. We’ve…traveled back in time to save an ancient species from…total annihilation. SO FAR…no…signs of aquatic life, but I’m going to find it. If I have to tear this universe another black hole, I’m going to find it. I’ve…GOT TO, MISTER.

…and a clean pair of shorts.

Oh yeah? And you’re ugly.

I found a rare stone at the bottom of Snowflake’s tank. It belonged to a 1984 AFC Championship ring. It would have been a Super Bowl ring, but Ray Finkle missed the big kick. Blames the whole thing on Marino. We’re talking mental institute escapee. I saw the guy’s room. Cozy if you’re Hannibal Lecter!

Hi, I’m looking for Ray Finkle.

I think it’s the pt.

Free Animals Now. Started in 1982, by Chelsea Gamble, daughter of the famous industrialist Fisher Gamble. Over half a million members from Florida to Finland. No. Who are they?

Ok, I’m really gonna go this time.

I came to confess. I was the second gunman on the grassy knoll.

Vat happened to him? Vat happened to me? Seven years I am wit Siegfried.

Oh there is just one more thing Lieutenant…

Heinz Getwellvet. I am trainer of dolphins. You want to talk to de dolphin, you talk to me.

I have to have money to buy food. I have to have a dolphin to get the money. I don’t see a dolphin around here, do you?

My esteemed colleague, Mr. Marino, has just brought some new evidence to my attention. Now, history has certainly shown that even the most intuitive criminal investigator can be wrong from time to time. But if I am mistaken…if the Lieutenant is indeed a woman, as she claims to be…then, my friend, she is suffering from the worst case of hemorrhoids I have ever seen!

Heads up! Good defense! Good defense!

What the…That’s it! Einhorn is Finkle! Finkle is Einhorn! Einhorn is a man!

Your request is not unlike your lower intestine, stinky and loaded with danger.

Whew…now I feel better. ‘Course, that might not do any good you see nobody’s missing a porpoise. It’s a dolphin that’s been taken. The common harbor porpoise has an abrupt snout, pointed teeth and a triangular thoracic fin. While the bottlenose dolphin, or Tursiops truncates, has an elongated beak, round cone shaped teeth and a serrated dorsal appendage. But I’m sure you already knew that. That’s what turns me on about ‘cha, your attention to detail.

Well? Are you satisfied?

HDS, sir, and how are you this afternoon? All righty, then. I have a package for you.

Well, I’m not really ready for a relationship, Lois, but thank you for asking. Hey, maybe I’ll give you a call sometime. Your number’s still 911? All righty then.

  

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